Normally, this is the sort of notice that would go on my Facebook feed, but I've posted there too much today. Yet I don't want to lose the thought entirely:
I finally deciphered the note on our fridge as "Internet bill: 14.00 each." Until now, I was wondering why my roommate was looking for "intolerant basil" and why he wanted to catch 1400 of them.
Later Days.
Showing posts with label facebook. Show all posts
Showing posts with label facebook. Show all posts
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Thursday, September 22, 2011
To live, perchance to pun. Aye, there's the rub.
Some of the best verbal jokes are the spontaneous, inadvertent ones. The ones that come from unplanned spoonerisms, unwitting malapropisms, and just total mispronounciations and misreadings. (For everyone who's familiar with the frequency I utter a mispronounciation: you're welcome. I'm very glad my social mortification is a constant source of enjoyment for you.) The non-premeditated joke is funny because its arrival seems like a gift, a small, unexpected windfall. It's nothing that you can't live without, but while it's there, one should appreciate its presence, like a rainbow or a good cup of tea. (On the other side of the scale, the planned joke becomes impressive through its sheer elaborateness, the length and scale required to reach the punchline. One of my favorites is a Spider Robinson story that constructs an entire sci-fi universe just to build to a colossally groan-worthy pun between two meanings of "note.")
The repression of such a misreading, then, is all the more frustrating. It feels like a burden, a rhetorical weight on your chest. There are many reasons for repressing a spontaneous joke, but most come down to social niceties. It's not the right place for that kind of statement. It's not the right moment. There's no one around you that would appreciate that kind of humor. You don't know the other person well enough and worry that you risk offending them. So you stifle the joke, make a mental note, and if you're lucky enough, you get to recount it to someone later. But more often then not, such jokes live and die in their immediate context; transposed into a foreign environment, they wither and die. But still, a part of me thinks, better to tell a joke that flops than to bury it, suppress it, and ponder what might have been. That, more than anything, convinces me of the value of Twitter: whatever else it may have done to the level of discourse, it gives us a forum for tossing our contextually unutterables into, a place where the joke, though perhaps still unappreciated, can at least be expressed. (There's still the potential for repercussions, of course. Tweet wisely, people.)
All of this is to say, I just misread someone's Facebook status as "freeballing" rather than "bailing" and gosh darn h-e-double toothpicks, that's funny. But I'm too chicken to face the potential, pretty much nonexistent consequences of posting that publicly. So I've dissected it here in the hopes that going to such ridiculous lengths will take the original joke from inadvertent misreading to elaborate amusement. Because nothing makes a joke funny like explaining it over and over.
Bonus game for people who have access to my friends list: Try and guess whose status I'm referring to! Don't guess here though. Keep it to yourself. And only to yourself. Repress your urge to tell it to anyone else. Ha! Now you know how it feels!
Later Days.
The repression of such a misreading, then, is all the more frustrating. It feels like a burden, a rhetorical weight on your chest. There are many reasons for repressing a spontaneous joke, but most come down to social niceties. It's not the right place for that kind of statement. It's not the right moment. There's no one around you that would appreciate that kind of humor. You don't know the other person well enough and worry that you risk offending them. So you stifle the joke, make a mental note, and if you're lucky enough, you get to recount it to someone later. But more often then not, such jokes live and die in their immediate context; transposed into a foreign environment, they wither and die. But still, a part of me thinks, better to tell a joke that flops than to bury it, suppress it, and ponder what might have been. That, more than anything, convinces me of the value of Twitter: whatever else it may have done to the level of discourse, it gives us a forum for tossing our contextually unutterables into, a place where the joke, though perhaps still unappreciated, can at least be expressed. (There's still the potential for repercussions, of course. Tweet wisely, people.)
All of this is to say, I just misread someone's Facebook status as "freeballing" rather than "bailing" and gosh darn h-e-double toothpicks, that's funny. But I'm too chicken to face the potential, pretty much nonexistent consequences of posting that publicly. So I've dissected it here in the hopes that going to such ridiculous lengths will take the original joke from inadvertent misreading to elaborate amusement. Because nothing makes a joke funny like explaining it over and over.
Bonus game for people who have access to my friends list: Try and guess whose status I'm referring to! Don't guess here though. Keep it to yourself. And only to yourself. Repress your urge to tell it to anyone else. Ha! Now you know how it feels!
Later Days.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Typography Fascist
Is that the appropriate equivalent of a grammar nazi? Well, we'll go with that, for lack of a better term.
Anyway, a friend of mine recently (i.e., within a month or so) posted a link to this article on his facebook feed: http://www.slate.com/id/2281146/.
For those too lazy to read two articles in one day, the essay's author essentially is arguing for the use of a single space after a period rather than a double space. The reaction to the article that I posted on Facebook was less than kind: "If I'm not going to listen to those elitist "manners" people when they tell me how to hold my fork and knife, or tie my shoes, or get out of a car, then a typographer with an ax to grind isn't going to get me to change my ways. Don't these people have better things to do? Like complain about lax spelling in text messages?"
I would like to apologize for that comment. It was flippant, dismissive, and rude. It's also ill-advised in terms of my research; a part of my study is on the design of text in video games, and thus it would behoove me not to upset any errant typographers who may be insulted by such comments. And finally, it's incredibly hypocritical of me to even imply that typographers are making a big deal over nothing, since my role as an English instructor has brought me to the point where I refuse to allow students to use "that" as a subject, use "quote" as a noun, and, if possible, avoid using the word "similarly" altogether.
So I apologize. I apologize to my friend, I apologize to anyone offended by comment, and I apologize to the article's writer.
I still think he's wrong, though.
Allow me to summarize his argument, and respond to each point in turn:
1) Typographers say it should be one space.
2) It's an unnecessary holdover (skeumorph!) from the typewriter.
3) Two spaces don't signal proper stops so much as eliminate the flow of the writing.
4)Using a single space isn't any more arbitrary than using a double space.
My response:
1) Elitism isn't an argument, it's an excuse. And a bad one at that. Just because the experts act in a certain way doesn't mean you should follow their lead--unless there's a good reason to do so. Personally, I'm in favor of viewing grammar and structure as concepts that are more fluid than they're generally held to be; I think, when there's no clear reason not to, such conventions such bend to common usage. I could, admittedly, be accused of hypocrisy here, since any student attempting a common usage argument in my classroom wouldn't get very far with me. To that charge, I offer two responses: first, I honestly think that most of the grammatical elements I insist on improve on clarity, and thus justify deviation from popular use. And second, writing should always take into account its context; certain rules of grammar should be more rigorously observed because of the purpose of the document. A scholarly essay is different in tone than a personal email, and grammar is one of the many indicators of that fact. If Manjoo is arguing for a single space in all cases, and I don't think there's grounds for such a universal rule.
2) This reason is better, but still not sufficient. If we're going to argue against the use of typewriter conventions, then we should start by fundamentally redesigning the keyboard and the basic presentation form of the computer document. Spacing figures relatively low on that list of priorities.
3)Yes, spaces create pauses; that's the point. The end of a sentence is a logical place to create a pause, and using just a period and capital letter to signal that pause isn't enough for me. To create a mental pause, a visible spatial pause is the most economical option. Personally, I don't find that the double space interrupts flow; that's what the paragraph break is for. Even in Manjoo's article, when I glance at it, it's the space between paragraphs that signal to me that he's starting a new idea, not a double space between sentences. (Not that he uses the double space, but please, work with me here.)
4)I don't even know if this argument needs dismissing--it dismisses itself pretty well. Arguing that the double-space argument might be arbitrary but so is the single-space doesn't really get us much beyond the "I know you are, but what am I?" sort of taunt.
I suppose what really bugs me about this article is that the author states right off right near the beginning that what really irritates him isn't just that others use the double space method, but that they insist that anyone who does otherwise is wrong--his exact stance on the single space. (Granted, he's not as extreme on this issue as some of the others he cites. "Type crimes?") Rather than insist this author should adopt the two-space method, I'm going to conclude with the same conclusion that someone posted to the comments of my friend's Facebook links:
"I don't care how many spaces you put into your own paper as long as you dont tell me how many to put in mine."
Tell it, sister. And since a Facebook post is an informal forum, I'm not even going to make a disparaging comment about the missing apostrophe.
...Oops.
Later Days.
Anyway, a friend of mine recently (i.e., within a month or so) posted a link to this article on his facebook feed: http://www.slate.com/id/2281146/.
For those too lazy to read two articles in one day, the essay's author essentially is arguing for the use of a single space after a period rather than a double space. The reaction to the article that I posted on Facebook was less than kind: "If I'm not going to listen to those elitist "manners" people when they tell me how to hold my fork and knife, or tie my shoes, or get out of a car, then a typographer with an ax to grind isn't going to get me to change my ways. Don't these people have better things to do? Like complain about lax spelling in text messages?"
I would like to apologize for that comment. It was flippant, dismissive, and rude. It's also ill-advised in terms of my research; a part of my study is on the design of text in video games, and thus it would behoove me not to upset any errant typographers who may be insulted by such comments. And finally, it's incredibly hypocritical of me to even imply that typographers are making a big deal over nothing, since my role as an English instructor has brought me to the point where I refuse to allow students to use "that" as a subject, use "quote" as a noun, and, if possible, avoid using the word "similarly" altogether.
So I apologize. I apologize to my friend, I apologize to anyone offended by comment, and I apologize to the article's writer.
I still think he's wrong, though.
Allow me to summarize his argument, and respond to each point in turn:
1) Typographers say it should be one space.
2) It's an unnecessary holdover (skeumorph!) from the typewriter.
3) Two spaces don't signal proper stops so much as eliminate the flow of the writing.
4)Using a single space isn't any more arbitrary than using a double space.
My response:
1) Elitism isn't an argument, it's an excuse. And a bad one at that. Just because the experts act in a certain way doesn't mean you should follow their lead--unless there's a good reason to do so. Personally, I'm in favor of viewing grammar and structure as concepts that are more fluid than they're generally held to be; I think, when there's no clear reason not to, such conventions such bend to common usage. I could, admittedly, be accused of hypocrisy here, since any student attempting a common usage argument in my classroom wouldn't get very far with me. To that charge, I offer two responses: first, I honestly think that most of the grammatical elements I insist on improve on clarity, and thus justify deviation from popular use. And second, writing should always take into account its context; certain rules of grammar should be more rigorously observed because of the purpose of the document. A scholarly essay is different in tone than a personal email, and grammar is one of the many indicators of that fact. If Manjoo is arguing for a single space in all cases, and I don't think there's grounds for such a universal rule.
2) This reason is better, but still not sufficient. If we're going to argue against the use of typewriter conventions, then we should start by fundamentally redesigning the keyboard and the basic presentation form of the computer document. Spacing figures relatively low on that list of priorities.
3)Yes, spaces create pauses; that's the point. The end of a sentence is a logical place to create a pause, and using just a period and capital letter to signal that pause isn't enough for me. To create a mental pause, a visible spatial pause is the most economical option. Personally, I don't find that the double space interrupts flow; that's what the paragraph break is for. Even in Manjoo's article, when I glance at it, it's the space between paragraphs that signal to me that he's starting a new idea, not a double space between sentences. (Not that he uses the double space, but please, work with me here.)
4)I don't even know if this argument needs dismissing--it dismisses itself pretty well. Arguing that the double-space argument might be arbitrary but so is the single-space doesn't really get us much beyond the "I know you are, but what am I?" sort of taunt.
I suppose what really bugs me about this article is that the author states right off right near the beginning that what really irritates him isn't just that others use the double space method, but that they insist that anyone who does otherwise is wrong--his exact stance on the single space. (Granted, he's not as extreme on this issue as some of the others he cites. "Type crimes?") Rather than insist this author should adopt the two-space method, I'm going to conclude with the same conclusion that someone posted to the comments of my friend's Facebook links:
"I don't care how many spaces you put into your own paper as long as you dont tell me how many to put in mine."
Tell it, sister. And since a Facebook post is an informal forum, I'm not even going to make a disparaging comment about the missing apostrophe.
...Oops.
Later Days.
Friday, March 26, 2010
This One's For the Saskatchewan Folk
Recently, my youngest brother, currently residing in Alberta, posted on his Facebook status that he felt out of the loop and wanted to get the news on what's going on in Saskatchewan. Since I'm even further away than he is, I felt the obligation to make something up. And since the other brother thought there was some value in what I came up with, I thought I'd post it here. It's random nonsense, but I kind of like it.
By popular demand, Brad Wall has been replaced by an actual Wall. While Wall has provided valuable infrastructure to the current parliament as a whole, people doubt Wall's long term planning ability. Further, Wall's leadership capability has been called into question; whenever quick action is called for, Wall is reputed to just stand there, blankly. When questioned about this lack of activity, Wall stood silently for 45 minutes until all the reporters felt embarrassed and went home to spend more time with their families.
Later Days.
By popular demand, Brad Wall has been replaced by an actual Wall. While Wall has provided valuable infrastructure to the current parliament as a whole, people doubt Wall's long term planning ability. Further, Wall's leadership capability has been called into question; whenever quick action is called for, Wall is reputed to just stand there, blankly. When questioned about this lack of activity, Wall stood silently for 45 minutes until all the reporters felt embarrassed and went home to spend more time with their families.
Later Days.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Flipping the Clock
It is time, once again, (fifth time, to be exact) to reset the mighty stat counter. As is traditional, this moment will be observed by an analysis of the word searches that have led people to this blog. It seems that with the TV show "Chuck" on hiatus, the number of people searching for Chuck and Sara porn has dropped precipitously. What's left, then, is an actual reflection of this blog's content:
"sexy" Riyadh, Saudi Arabia
"what movies have been made from the author of the door into summer" United States
"short review the door into summer by robert heinlein" Oakland, California
"Gothic elements" 'Painted Door' Sinclair Ross" Halifax, Nova Scotia
"libraries toronto" Toronto, Ontario
"david antin" San Diego, California
"review THE DOOR INTO SUMMER by Robert Heinlein" Bois-de-lessines, Belgium
"rushdie marco polo" Warsaw, Indiana
"rushdie enchantress" New York, United States
"Lorna Crozier poem 'The Painted Door'" Regina, Saskatchewan
"door into summer review" Ithica, New York
"Fallout 3 progress blog" Greenfield, Indiana
"Post Colonism in Enchantress of Florence" Delhi, India
"best study space robarts library" Thornhill, Ontario
"salman rushdie enchantress of florence review" West Hartford, Conneticut
"compliant and promiscuous by military custom" South Hamilton, Massachusetts
"the door into summer 'horse sense'" Potomac, Maryland
"farscape dilbert" Huntsville, Alabama
"waking up cant get back to sleep" London, UK
"waking up and cant get back to sleep" Richardson, Texas
"www.humbugbistro.ca" Humboldt, SK
"www.humbugbistro" Humboldt, SK
"humbugbisto.com" Saskatoon, SK
"humbugbistro.blogspot.com" Lanigan,SK
"humbugbistro.blogspot.com" Humboldt, SK
"humbugbistro.blogspot.com" Edmonton, AB
"humbugbistro.blogspot.com" Saskatoon, SK
I also got a lot of traffic for this post, largely because I made a cryptic reference to it on my Facebook status, which led to some further traffic on other pages. And then petered out, because Facebook friends are numerous, but easily distracted.
As you can see, the humbug bistro blog has really ruffled some feathers, and I guess the related URLs have let it out of the bag which town "humbug" actually refers to. Beyond that, most of the traffic seems geared towards my Heinlein and Rushdie reviews, which I'm glad for, since I put a fair bit of effort into writing both.
I'd like to draw your attention to two searches in particular: first, "compliant and promiscuous by military custom." I hope the searcher knew he or she was using a quotation directly from "the Forever War," because otherwise, that's a really creepy fetish.
Second: "Post Colonism in Enchantress of Florence." That sounds like the Enchantress encountered a nasty movement after a meal.
And on that classy note, I'm going to wrap things up. May the next 500 visitors be as interesting as this 500.
Later Days.
"sexy" Riyadh, Saudi Arabia
"what movies have been made from the author of the door into summer" United States
"short review the door into summer by robert heinlein" Oakland, California
"Gothic elements" 'Painted Door' Sinclair Ross" Halifax, Nova Scotia
"libraries toronto" Toronto, Ontario
"david antin" San Diego, California
"review THE DOOR INTO SUMMER by Robert Heinlein" Bois-de-lessines, Belgium
"rushdie marco polo" Warsaw, Indiana
"rushdie enchantress" New York, United States
"Lorna Crozier poem 'The Painted Door'" Regina, Saskatchewan
"door into summer review" Ithica, New York
"Fallout 3 progress blog" Greenfield, Indiana
"Post Colonism in Enchantress of Florence" Delhi, India
"best study space robarts library" Thornhill, Ontario
"salman rushdie enchantress of florence review" West Hartford, Conneticut
"compliant and promiscuous by military custom" South Hamilton, Massachusetts
"the door into summer 'horse sense'" Potomac, Maryland
"farscape dilbert" Huntsville, Alabama
"waking up cant get back to sleep" London, UK
"waking up and cant get back to sleep" Richardson, Texas
"www.humbugbistro.ca" Humboldt, SK
"www.humbugbistro" Humboldt, SK
"humbugbisto.com" Saskatoon, SK
"humbugbistro.blogspot.com" Lanigan,SK
"humbugbistro.blogspot.com" Humboldt, SK
"humbugbistro.blogspot.com" Edmonton, AB
"humbugbistro.blogspot.com" Saskatoon, SK
I also got a lot of traffic for this post, largely because I made a cryptic reference to it on my Facebook status, which led to some further traffic on other pages. And then petered out, because Facebook friends are numerous, but easily distracted.
As you can see, the humbug bistro blog has really ruffled some feathers, and I guess the related URLs have let it out of the bag which town "humbug" actually refers to. Beyond that, most of the traffic seems geared towards my Heinlein and Rushdie reviews, which I'm glad for, since I put a fair bit of effort into writing both.
I'd like to draw your attention to two searches in particular: first, "compliant and promiscuous by military custom." I hope the searcher knew he or she was using a quotation directly from "the Forever War," because otherwise, that's a really creepy fetish.
Second: "Post Colonism in Enchantress of Florence." That sounds like the Enchantress encountered a nasty movement after a meal.
And on that classy note, I'm going to wrap things up. May the next 500 visitors be as interesting as this 500.
Later Days.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
In Which I Make Not One, But Two People's Birthdays All About Me
One of the handy, how-did-we-ever-do-without-it features of Facebook is a little box that tells you when one of your friends is having a birthday. Given that a typical Friend list is approximately at least 100 or so friends long, that means you've got, on average, eight birthday notifications a month. Of course, not everyone posts their date of birth, so let's round that down to four. Still, that's a lot of birthdays. And you can't skip a birthday--not unless you want to face THAT social stigma. So you're left with posting birthday message after message, until the sheer banality makes you envy the creative powers of greeting card writers.
Happy Birthday, X!
Happy B-Day, X.
Have a gooder, X.
Hey man, happy birthday!
Birthday wishes!
Hope your day is nice!
Way to be born!
And the pressure to conform and just go with Facebook's own brand of birthday expression (Send X a Gift!) builds and builds, and the evil that is social networking is revealed in all its internal systemizing glory.
But no. I refuse to succumb to such mediocrity. I started a campaign to create meaningful, caring birthday messages that contain layers of symbolic meaning: each message represents what I think of that person, what I think they think of me, and what I think is appropriate for a Facebook birthday message. This entry was an early foray into this bold new genre.
Future attempts focused on the historical moment. One friend, for example, was born on the same date that featured, years earlier, an historic defeat of the Scots at the hands of the British. So he got to hear all about that war. Another friend was born on the day of composer Albert Lortzing, so he got a summary of the opera Der Waffenschmie, and a short note about why it was relevant to his life. Plus a short youtube clip of the opera.
Yes, my friends love these messages. Why do you ask?
But with this last message, I discovered you could attach youtube links, and suddenly, I had access to a new bold venue. That's why, for this Tuesday, I sent out two radically different Facebook birthday messages. First, this message:
“Youth is happy because it has the ability to see beauty. Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old.”
- Franz Kafka
So here's to growing wiser, but not older. Happy birthday!
And second, this message:
Birthday!
And the point, which I have reached in my classic roundabout manner, is that, in posting these two particular birthday wishes in short succession, is that their incongruity really struck me. The radical difference in tone made me consider not just what each of these girls meant to me, but rather, what image I wanted to present to them. The process really drove home to me how much identity is constructed, and, sometimes, willfully constructed. Which birthday wish is more authentically me? Is there an authentic me?
Facebook: good for existential crises AND wishing people happy birthday. Hallmark WISHES they could do both.
(Special bonus: people who know me in RT can try and guess who the two ladies in question are. No fair cheating by looking on Facebook.)
Later Days.
Happy Birthday, X!
Happy B-Day, X.
Have a gooder, X.
Hey man, happy birthday!
Birthday wishes!
Hope your day is nice!
Way to be born!
And the pressure to conform and just go with Facebook's own brand of birthday expression (Send X a Gift!) builds and builds, and the evil that is social networking is revealed in all its internal systemizing glory.
But no. I refuse to succumb to such mediocrity. I started a campaign to create meaningful, caring birthday messages that contain layers of symbolic meaning: each message represents what I think of that person, what I think they think of me, and what I think is appropriate for a Facebook birthday message. This entry was an early foray into this bold new genre.
Future attempts focused on the historical moment. One friend, for example, was born on the same date that featured, years earlier, an historic defeat of the Scots at the hands of the British. So he got to hear all about that war. Another friend was born on the day of composer Albert Lortzing, so he got a summary of the opera Der Waffenschmie, and a short note about why it was relevant to his life. Plus a short youtube clip of the opera.
Yes, my friends love these messages. Why do you ask?
But with this last message, I discovered you could attach youtube links, and suddenly, I had access to a new bold venue. That's why, for this Tuesday, I sent out two radically different Facebook birthday messages. First, this message:
“Youth is happy because it has the ability to see beauty. Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old.”
- Franz Kafka
So here's to growing wiser, but not older. Happy birthday!
And second, this message:
Birthday!
And the point, which I have reached in my classic roundabout manner, is that, in posting these two particular birthday wishes in short succession, is that their incongruity really struck me. The radical difference in tone made me consider not just what each of these girls meant to me, but rather, what image I wanted to present to them. The process really drove home to me how much identity is constructed, and, sometimes, willfully constructed. Which birthday wish is more authentically me? Is there an authentic me?
Facebook: good for existential crises AND wishing people happy birthday. Hallmark WISHES they could do both.
(Special bonus: people who know me in RT can try and guess who the two ladies in question are. No fair cheating by looking on Facebook.)
Later Days.
Friday, August 7, 2009
Facebook: Finally, a place for inappropriate venting on the internet
This time 'round, I've spared you all from endless complaints regarding my term papers, and posted them on Facebook instead. Now, since there's nothing else of note to post, here's a "greatest hits" compilation (with Person substituted for my actual name). My theory is that compiling all this information in one place will provide keen insight into the working process. First, the background. The post-colonial paper was on how the video game Mass Effect allows players to work out colonial ideologies in safe environments. The art and persuasion course paper was on how David Antin's talk poems can be better viewed as tours rather than maps, following Certeau's spatial theories. For the record, Mass Effect is a video game in which the player saves the galaxy from a machine race invasion, and makes several choices regarding the genocide of other species while s/he's at it. And Antin is a poet who's thing is that he shows up, gives an hour long talk, records it, writes down the result, removes all the spacing, captials, and margins, and calls both the book and the talk poetry. The former was due July 23, the latter Aug 4. I am happy both are done. First, the Antin stuff:
Person realized his original presentation was in 11 size font, which means he has a ten page paper instead of eight. Which also means that in order to "build on without expanding," I'm going to have to cut about half of it, and still glue on a new argument that fits with the remains. Oh, the terrible conundrums of a grad student.
July 24 at 4:40pm.
Person is reading David Antin's latest book of talk poetry and noticed that Antin was using an apostrophe, and immediately became disgusted that the poet was selling out. And that's when he realized he was entirely too involved.
July 30 at 1:18pm.
Person : God help him if I find a semi-colon.
July 30 at 1:18pm.
Person wrote 1800 words today. On his blog. The paper, sadly, did not go nearly as well.
July 31 at 6:29pm.
Person:"now in this sense every subjectivity is social to the extent that it is localized consciousness but to become a self it has to survive the collision or union with other things and endure." Antin tells us this is poetry. I choose to believe him.
August 1 at 10:10am.
Person feels like it's time for a status check. At the moment, I'm 2000 words and 6 pages into my Eng 760 paper, and calling it a night. Anyone else want to weigh in on how their efforts are going?
August 1 at 8:41pm.
Person is done, bitches. Aug 2 at 9:32 pm.
What an ending. Crap, I'm articulate. And the Postcolonial Paper (which, frankly, is more entertaining):
Person is trying to work on his paper, but the asari matriarch won't friggin' die
July 11 at 3:11am.
Person is having the most research-productive day EVER.
July 14 at 7:46pm.
Person:First, I stumbled onto this gem, by Douglas: "Video games do not threaten film's status so much as they threaten religion, because they perform the same existentially soothing task as religion. They proffer a world of meaning in which we not only have a task to perform, but a world made with us in mind." Which redefines my area of study as an act of worship. And my folks say I never go to church.
July 14th at 7:49pm.
Person: Second, in"Colonialism and the emergence of science fiction," Rieder describes the "lost race" trope, in which a secret treasure map leads a white European stand-in to a lost civilization in the middle of a colonized people, and identifies the trope as a staple of colonial literature. And since that's basically "Mass Effect" 's entire plot, that makes my postcolonial paper on video games a lot easier.
July 14th at 7:53pm.
Person: Can you imagine how my life would have been wasted if I went into mathematics instead of English? Granted, I'd probably be enthusiastically posting about the amazing awesomeness of invariant polynomial algebras, but think of the loss to the Humanities.
July 14th at 7:56pm.
Person just found a paper entitled 'Nintendo and New World Travel Writing.' Or to phrase it differently, post-colonial score.
July 16 at 8:31pm.
Person just made his 200th Xbox achievement in the pursuit of his Mass Effect paper. Yet somehow, it doesn't feel an achievement at all...
July 17 at 11:34pm.
Person is finishing Mass Effect tongiht, come hell or high water. And he's goingt to be transcribing the efforts in half hour intervals. So... enjoy. First up: goin' to Ilos.
July 19 at 1:07am.
Person: Post 2. Went through all the crew's final conversations. And the romance subplot. Kaidan'svall man, ladies. Also: a guy that can make things move with his mind should have a better pick-up line than 'you make me feel... human."
July 19 at 1:42 am.
Person: Lost in Ilos. I was wandering around for ten minutes before realizing that what I thought wasa button for the door was actually a button for the elevators.
July 19 at 2:15am.
Person: I spent another 20 minutes wandering around before I remembered I had toreturn to the first level after unlocking the bay door. In the process, I discovered I could push my fellow teammates off the elevator ledges. This provided some amusement.
July 19 at 2:41am.
Person: A half hour mapping out Vigil's dialogue options. Still on Ilos.
July 19 at 3:10am.
Person: Still mapping out Vigil's dialogue. Mouthy little VI. Still on Ilos.
Julyv19 at 3:41am.
Person: *six pages of transcription* DAMN IT VIGIL, SHUT THE HELL UP!
July 19 at 4:10am.
Person:Now we're cooking. In the citadel, first saren battle. Gotta love an end boss that uses a hover platform.
July 19 at 5:12am.
Person: And THAT is how you save a galaxy from an impeding Reaper invasion. It's 5:35. Do you know where your next dictatorship in the name of humanity is?
July 19 at 5:35am.
Other: You. Are. Crazy.
July 19 at 12:47pm.
Person: I spent an hour writing down all of the conversational options of a machine inside a disc inside a game system. So... I don't think I can dispute that.
July 19 at 2:23pm.
Person made an outline for his essay. That's enough for today, right?
July 19 at 3:32pm.
Person was thinking about pulling a quotation from "The Empire Writes Back" for the paper, but the book feels a little 'undergraduatey.' A question to the masses: What do you think?
July 19 at 5:50pm.
Person: One alternative is that I'm intellectual snob. Of course, that could hold regardless of the answer.
July 19 at 5:53pm.
Person just learned to snap his fingers... I don't think I've ever put this much effort into procrastinating on a paper.
July 20 at 9:26pm.
Person probably can't get away with including his eight paged appendix in his page count.
July 21 at 8:28pm.
Person IZ DUN.
July 22 at 2:08am.
...And there we are. So much for insight, huh? I think the most interesting thing here, to put myself under the microscope, is how my expressive style changes depending on the medium: Facebook, or the blog. If anyone who's powered through this whole thing sees a difference too, feel free to comment.
Later Days.
Person realized his original presentation was in 11 size font, which means he has a ten page paper instead of eight. Which also means that in order to "build on without expanding," I'm going to have to cut about half of it, and still glue on a new argument that fits with the remains. Oh, the terrible conundrums of a grad student.
July 24 at 4:40pm.
Person is reading David Antin's latest book of talk poetry and noticed that Antin was using an apostrophe, and immediately became disgusted that the poet was selling out. And that's when he realized he was entirely too involved.
July 30 at 1:18pm.
Person : God help him if I find a semi-colon.
July 30 at 1:18pm.
Person wrote 1800 words today. On his blog. The paper, sadly, did not go nearly as well.
July 31 at 6:29pm.
Person:"now in this sense every subjectivity is social to the extent that it is localized consciousness but to become a self it has to survive the collision or union with other things and endure." Antin tells us this is poetry. I choose to believe him.
August 1 at 10:10am.
Person feels like it's time for a status check. At the moment, I'm 2000 words and 6 pages into my Eng 760 paper, and calling it a night. Anyone else want to weigh in on how their efforts are going?
August 1 at 8:41pm.
Person is done, bitches. Aug 2 at 9:32 pm.
What an ending. Crap, I'm articulate. And the Postcolonial Paper (which, frankly, is more entertaining):
Person is trying to work on his paper, but the asari matriarch won't friggin' die
July 11 at 3:11am.
Person is having the most research-productive day EVER.
July 14 at 7:46pm.
Person:First, I stumbled onto this gem, by Douglas: "Video games do not threaten film's status so much as they threaten religion, because they perform the same existentially soothing task as religion. They proffer a world of meaning in which we not only have a task to perform, but a world made with us in mind." Which redefines my area of study as an act of worship. And my folks say I never go to church.
July 14th at 7:49pm.
Person: Second, in"Colonialism and the emergence of science fiction," Rieder describes the "lost race" trope, in which a secret treasure map leads a white European stand-in to a lost civilization in the middle of a colonized people, and identifies the trope as a staple of colonial literature. And since that's basically "Mass Effect" 's entire plot, that makes my postcolonial paper on video games a lot easier.
July 14th at 7:53pm.
Person: Can you imagine how my life would have been wasted if I went into mathematics instead of English? Granted, I'd probably be enthusiastically posting about the amazing awesomeness of invariant polynomial algebras, but think of the loss to the Humanities.
July 14th at 7:56pm.
Person just found a paper entitled 'Nintendo and New World Travel Writing.' Or to phrase it differently, post-colonial score.
July 16 at 8:31pm.
Person just made his 200th Xbox achievement in the pursuit of his Mass Effect paper. Yet somehow, it doesn't feel an achievement at all...
July 17 at 11:34pm.
Person is finishing Mass Effect tongiht, come hell or high water. And he's goingt to be transcribing the efforts in half hour intervals. So... enjoy. First up: goin' to Ilos.
July 19 at 1:07am.
Person: Post 2. Went through all the crew's final conversations. And the romance subplot. Kaidan'svall man, ladies. Also: a guy that can make things move with his mind should have a better pick-up line than 'you make me feel... human."
July 19 at 1:42 am.
Person: Lost in Ilos. I was wandering around for ten minutes before realizing that what I thought wasa button for the door was actually a button for the elevators.
July 19 at 2:15am.
Person: I spent another 20 minutes wandering around before I remembered I had toreturn to the first level after unlocking the bay door. In the process, I discovered I could push my fellow teammates off the elevator ledges. This provided some amusement.
July 19 at 2:41am.
Person: A half hour mapping out Vigil's dialogue options. Still on Ilos.
July 19 at 3:10am.
Person: Still mapping out Vigil's dialogue. Mouthy little VI. Still on Ilos.
Julyv19 at 3:41am.
Person: *six pages of transcription* DAMN IT VIGIL, SHUT THE HELL UP!
July 19 at 4:10am.
Person:Now we're cooking. In the citadel, first saren battle. Gotta love an end boss that uses a hover platform.
July 19 at 5:12am.
Person: And THAT is how you save a galaxy from an impeding Reaper invasion. It's 5:35. Do you know where your next dictatorship in the name of humanity is?
July 19 at 5:35am.
Other: You. Are. Crazy.
July 19 at 12:47pm.
Person: I spent an hour writing down all of the conversational options of a machine inside a disc inside a game system. So... I don't think I can dispute that.
July 19 at 2:23pm.
Person made an outline for his essay. That's enough for today, right?
July 19 at 3:32pm.
Person was thinking about pulling a quotation from "The Empire Writes Back" for the paper, but the book feels a little 'undergraduatey.' A question to the masses: What do you think?
July 19 at 5:50pm.
Person: One alternative is that I'm intellectual snob. Of course, that could hold regardless of the answer.
July 19 at 5:53pm.
Person just learned to snap his fingers... I don't think I've ever put this much effort into procrastinating on a paper.
July 20 at 9:26pm.
Person probably can't get away with including his eight paged appendix in his page count.
July 21 at 8:28pm.
Person IZ DUN.
July 22 at 2:08am.
...And there we are. So much for insight, huh? I think the most interesting thing here, to put myself under the microscope, is how my expressive style changes depending on the medium: Facebook, or the blog. If anyone who's powered through this whole thing sees a difference too, feel free to comment.
Later Days.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Maybe You're Coming Off Desperate.
So there's this, I don't know, this "thing" going around Facebook these days. It's pretty simple: you get tagged, you write 25 things about yourself in a note, you tag 25 people, and they do the same.
Honestly, it's kind of annoying. I was kind of hoping that as we progressed down the information highway, we could leave things like a new equivalent of the e-chain-letter behind us. (I was also hoping we could leave the metaphor "information highway" behind us, but what can I say? You let in one early 2000 internet theme, you open the floodgates.) At least this ignores the phony "consequences" part--there's no penalty for failing to tag. On the other hand, you don't get the touching story about how a little old woman passed the chain letter on and the next day she fulfilled her life long dream of becoming a Norweigan folk singer. So that part's a toss up.
I haven't been tagged yet myself, and I'm greatful, frankly. I mean, if I feel the urge to cite random facts about myself that walk the line between boring and TMI, well, that's what the blog's for. I'm glad I don't have to do one. It's a real time killer, too. I mean 25 points takes a lot of effort, and by nineteen or so, you're resorting to things like "my nickname is Bubbles." It's more time-wasting nonsense that Facebook is, rightfully, famous for. Not to mention a symptom of the "I'm so interesting" modern culture that encourages everyone and their pet monkey to start a blog, or write a zine, or write a blog on their zine concerning their pet monkey. Some people don't HAVE 25 interesting things to say about themselves, and encouraging them is not a good idea. So I'm glad I don't have to do one.
WHY DOESN'T ANYONE LIKE MEEEEEE?
Later Days.
P.S. I see great things ahead for the "desperation" tag. It's going places, baby.
Honestly, it's kind of annoying. I was kind of hoping that as we progressed down the information highway, we could leave things like a new equivalent of the e-chain-letter behind us. (I was also hoping we could leave the metaphor "information highway" behind us, but what can I say? You let in one early 2000 internet theme, you open the floodgates.) At least this ignores the phony "consequences" part--there's no penalty for failing to tag. On the other hand, you don't get the touching story about how a little old woman passed the chain letter on and the next day she fulfilled her life long dream of becoming a Norweigan folk singer. So that part's a toss up.
I haven't been tagged yet myself, and I'm greatful, frankly. I mean, if I feel the urge to cite random facts about myself that walk the line between boring and TMI, well, that's what the blog's for. I'm glad I don't have to do one. It's a real time killer, too. I mean 25 points takes a lot of effort, and by nineteen or so, you're resorting to things like "my nickname is Bubbles." It's more time-wasting nonsense that Facebook is, rightfully, famous for. Not to mention a symptom of the "I'm so interesting" modern culture that encourages everyone and their pet monkey to start a blog, or write a zine, or write a blog on their zine concerning their pet monkey. Some people don't HAVE 25 interesting things to say about themselves, and encouraging them is not a good idea. So I'm glad I don't have to do one.
WHY DOESN'T ANYONE LIKE MEEEEEE?
Later Days.
P.S. I see great things ahead for the "desperation" tag. It's going places, baby.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Friendface gets its groove back
I'll post the regular comic stuff soon, but for now, I want to talk about a moment in history. A moment that gave us all something to believe in.
No, not THAT moment.
Once upon a time, Facebook had a lovely little application called Scrabbulous, which was an electronic version of the popular Scrabble. And it had all the benefits of an electronic version: you could play a round with friends separated by great distances, wait days between rounds, and check the online word creating sites to look for words (Ok, there was an honour system involved.). But it wasn't just an electronic version of Scrabble--it was an unauthorized electronic version of Scrabble. And so, one litigious event later, it disappeared.
Until today, when I received an email telling me that the troubles were over, and the new, improved, renamed and probably not as illegal Lexulous was available on Facebook again.
I wouldn't be bringing this up except for the number of sightings I've seen of the game since then. I got the email today, and I've already observed 4 people on the university's computers playing the new Lexulous. Assuming that I didn't see everyone, and that U of W's student population isn't for some reason composed of Scrabble fanatics, that means there's a huge level of support for this kind of thing--especially since it's free.
We could unpack this and come up with some interesting areas of discussion--the omnipresence of Facebook, the move to online gaming, the difficulties in capitalizing on internet products. And it's important to discuss these issues, rather than just charging blindly ahead. And I'd really love to talk about them, but... I have to go... and... play.... um, something. Something totally unrelated.
Later Days.
No, not THAT moment.
Once upon a time, Facebook had a lovely little application called Scrabbulous, which was an electronic version of the popular Scrabble. And it had all the benefits of an electronic version: you could play a round with friends separated by great distances, wait days between rounds, and check the online word creating sites to look for words (Ok, there was an honour system involved.). But it wasn't just an electronic version of Scrabble--it was an unauthorized electronic version of Scrabble. And so, one litigious event later, it disappeared.
Until today, when I received an email telling me that the troubles were over, and the new, improved, renamed and probably not as illegal Lexulous was available on Facebook again.
I wouldn't be bringing this up except for the number of sightings I've seen of the game since then. I got the email today, and I've already observed 4 people on the university's computers playing the new Lexulous. Assuming that I didn't see everyone, and that U of W's student population isn't for some reason composed of Scrabble fanatics, that means there's a huge level of support for this kind of thing--especially since it's free.
We could unpack this and come up with some interesting areas of discussion--the omnipresence of Facebook, the move to online gaming, the difficulties in capitalizing on internet products. And it's important to discuss these issues, rather than just charging blindly ahead. And I'd really love to talk about them, but... I have to go... and... play.... um, something. Something totally unrelated.
Later Days.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Person of Consequence is .
I was just a few websites down, playing with my Facebook account, when my attention was drawn to the plethora of Facebook ads available at the click of a mouse. Now, even prior to this, I knew on some level that, as nice as Facebook is, it isn't connecting me with family and friends out of the goodness of its own heart. But it's still kind of disturbing to how specific these ads are. 13 of the ads tell me that I could easily meet single women, which means they're mining my gender and relationship status. (At least, I'm assuming that they're using my relationship status. I could change the status and find out, but that would result in a lot of unnecessary 'xplain' to do within my Friendlist.)
There's an ad for Arrested Development t-shirts. Does that imply reading my Favorite TV shows list, or does it appear for everyone?
Many of the personals ads are Canadian-centric and another asks whether I am smarter than Steven Harper. (He's at 131, btw. Which is respectable, and certainly more than the "beat George Bush" ads you see everywhere.) So they're using my nationality.
Most disturbing are the ads targetted directly to residents of the city of ____________. It's a level of such specialization that I half-expect someone to come knocking on my door at any moment and offer my facebook account car insurance. (And that's where your wrong, faceless Facebook ad company! I don't even own a car!)
To further investigate this issue, I tried to make my own Facebook ad, which is ridiculously easy, as it turns out. All you need is a pre-existing account and a website and you pay a fee each time someone clicks on your ad. Facebook also includes a lot of helpful hints to writing a successful ad (and what it will accept); you can't use misleading images, you can't put WORDS IN CAPITALS or use Words That Aren't meant to be capitalized, for example. And you can't be derogatory towards your customers--no "you're fat, lose weight." It seems Facebook's looking at the big picture; no alienating the audience base.
Then there were the targetting choices. According to facebook, location is determined by IP address. And it does indeed choose ads based on profile keywords like "TV Shows." Other factors include gender, gender preference, relationship status, universities, jobs, even university majors. You use a "bid" to determine how much you're willing to pay per click or per view (in US currency), and the maximum amount per day.
Incidentally, according to Facebook, an ad that appears on every Facebook profile of Canadians 13+ will hit over 10 million people. According to the CIA (because who knows better than the public access portion of the CIA website?), Canada has about 33 million people (and covers an area "somewhat larger than the US" in a "strategic location between Russia and US". Try not to spend too much time thinking about what the CIA means by "strategic," there.), so that's a very sizable amount of our population using Facebook. And opening themselves up as key demographics.
(ASIDE: I was going to put CIA on my labels for this entry, but I really don't want to end up any scary lists. You heard it here first people: even after spending the last hour investigating their ad policies, Facebook is still more trustworthy than the US government.)
According to one of the papers the blog class has read recently, Facebook is trusted highly by its users, more so than, say, MySpace. But how much trust does it really deserve, when it was willing to let me and my fake ad utilize its profiles? Sure, it didn't provide access to any specific individuals, but if it's willing to let Joe Blow and his website take advantage of its system, how much would it take to divulge more info?
And if that's what Facebook is willing to do, who knows who is getting your Blogger data?
And with that thought, be sure to post those comments, people!
Providing that no one arrives in the next 24 hours to take me away in their discreet, unmarked van,
Later Days.
There's an ad for Arrested Development t-shirts. Does that imply reading my Favorite TV shows list, or does it appear for everyone?
Many of the personals ads are Canadian-centric and another asks whether I am smarter than Steven Harper. (He's at 131, btw. Which is respectable, and certainly more than the "beat George Bush" ads you see everywhere.) So they're using my nationality.
Most disturbing are the ads targetted directly to residents of the city of ____________. It's a level of such specialization that I half-expect someone to come knocking on my door at any moment and offer my facebook account car insurance. (And that's where your wrong, faceless Facebook ad company! I don't even own a car!)
To further investigate this issue, I tried to make my own Facebook ad, which is ridiculously easy, as it turns out. All you need is a pre-existing account and a website and you pay a fee each time someone clicks on your ad. Facebook also includes a lot of helpful hints to writing a successful ad (and what it will accept); you can't use misleading images, you can't put WORDS IN CAPITALS or use Words That Aren't meant to be capitalized, for example. And you can't be derogatory towards your customers--no "you're fat, lose weight." It seems Facebook's looking at the big picture; no alienating the audience base.
Then there were the targetting choices. According to facebook, location is determined by IP address. And it does indeed choose ads based on profile keywords like "TV Shows." Other factors include gender, gender preference, relationship status, universities, jobs, even university majors. You use a "bid" to determine how much you're willing to pay per click or per view (in US currency), and the maximum amount per day.
Incidentally, according to Facebook, an ad that appears on every Facebook profile of Canadians 13+ will hit over 10 million people. According to the CIA (because who knows better than the public access portion of the CIA website?), Canada has about 33 million people (and covers an area "somewhat larger than the US" in a "strategic location between Russia and US". Try not to spend too much time thinking about what the CIA means by "strategic," there.), so that's a very sizable amount of our population using Facebook. And opening themselves up as key demographics.
(ASIDE: I was going to put CIA on my labels for this entry, but I really don't want to end up any scary lists. You heard it here first people: even after spending the last hour investigating their ad policies, Facebook is still more trustworthy than the US government.)
According to one of the papers the blog class has read recently, Facebook is trusted highly by its users, more so than, say, MySpace. But how much trust does it really deserve, when it was willing to let me and my fake ad utilize its profiles? Sure, it didn't provide access to any specific individuals, but if it's willing to let Joe Blow and his website take advantage of its system, how much would it take to divulge more info?
And if that's what Facebook is willing to do, who knows who is getting your Blogger data?
And with that thought, be sure to post those comments, people!
Providing that no one arrives in the next 24 hours to take me away in their discreet, unmarked van,
Later Days.
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