All right, I'll admit it: this one's going to be a bit of a cheat. When I previously said that I liked the game's dialogue choice system, a large part of that fondness came from not just the choices, but the game's dialogue. I know there are dissenting opinions, but I greatly enjoyed the game's writing, particularly in terms of the banter between my party members as we wandered around the city of Kirkwall and surrounding areas. So because I don't want to think up anything actually original, here's 500 words or so of my favorite conversational gambits:
Merrill: I heard Varric saying you were a Grey Warden.
Anders: I was.
Merrill: I met a warden once. Back in Ferelden. Duncan, I think his name was. Very odd man.
Merrill: He had a marvelous beard, though. I'd never seen one before. I thought a squirrel had grabbed him by the chin.
* * *
And a lot of it is dependent on previous choices:
If Hawke romanced Merrill but also slept with Isabela
Anders: Hawke was a fool to let you move in. You'll only betray him/her. That's all your kind can do.
Merrill: Why do you only do this to me? Are you jealous? You never get upset about Hawke and Isabela.
Anders: You can't really get jealous because someone sleeps with Isabela. It's just...understood.
Anders: She's like a side dish. She comes with the meal.
If Isabela is in the party
Isabela: Only if it's a good meal.
* * *
Merrill: Thank you very much for the help earlier, Varric!
Varric: You made it back to the Alienage in one piece, then?
Merrill: I don't know how I wound up in Darktown. There are just too many corners in Kirkwall.
Varric: Still got that ball of twine?
Merrill: I left it at my house. Don't worry! I won't get lost while we're following Hawke.
Varric: Bring it next time, Daisy. Just in case.
I had a friend complain that the idea that Merrill finds her way through the city with a ball of twine completely implausible—merchants would trip over it, people would slice it, urchins would steal it, and so forth. I sympathize with the complaint, but on the other hand, I’m not really looking for 100% realism in my elf-ridden fantasy game with dragons, dwarves, and demons.
* * *
Isabela: You have such pretty hair. What a lovely color.
Aveline: Other children used to laugh at me for having ginger hair.
Isabela: Really? Aww. I bet you were cute. Did you have pigtails?
Aveline: Sometimes.
Isabela: How precious! Little Aveline, running around the village with her flaming orange pigtails streaming behind her...
Isabela: ...and little boys all scattering and screaming for mercy as she approached.
Aveline: Shut up, whore.
* * *
Aveline: How are you so successful with men? You're not that pretty.
Isabela: Cast a wide enough net, and you're bound to catch something.
Aveline: (Laughs) At least you're willing to admit it.
Isabela: Trust me. I've heard, "Get away from me, you pirate hag!" more times than I care to count.
Aveline: Doesn't that bother you?
Isabela: Why should it? They don't know me. I know me.
───────
Aveline: You're right.
Isabela: About?
Aveline: About knowing who you are.
Aveline: I'm the captain of the guard. I'm loyal, strong, and I don't look too bad naked.
Isabela: Exactly. And if I called you a mannish, awkward, ball-crushing do-gooder, you'd say...?
Aveline: Shut up, whore.
Isabela: That's my girl.
I think the Aveline/Isabela partnership is either the most complicated relationship since the Bowser/Mario team-up in Mario RPG. That, or more probably, there isn’t a single woman on the Dragon Age writing staff.
All quotations have been “borrowed” from the Dragon Age Wiki, your one-stop center for all information relating to Dragons, Ages, or any combination thereof. Later Days.
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