Monday, November 2, 2009

Suit Yourself

Halloween is awesome. There's no disputing that. And this Halloween was particularly awesome because I went to an Arrested Development-themed party. Dressed up as Barry Zuckerkorn. And we could do a whole post about how lovely that was, and who dressed up as what, and how many bananas on sticks were eaten, and who doesn't remember what because of how much rum they brought, but that's not today's focus.

Today's focus is on the preparations for the SLSA conference. The travel arrangements have been eye-rollingly complicated: first, I need to get a ride to Toronto, since Blank's airport doesn't service Atlanta. Then there's the flight itself. And the subway ride from the airport to the hotel (note to self: get American funds at some point for this). That's Thursday. The paper itself will be done on Saturday, (note to self: one round of editing at least is necessary before the paper is ready) and I get as much time as I can manage to celebrate before I go back to the airport for my 7 am flight back to Toronto Sunday morning. (Only I'll have to take a cab, since the subway doesn't start on a Sunday till 8 am.) And from Toronto, it's a shuttle bus back to my apartment.

All of that is entirely beside the point; I just wanted to see if I could actually write the whole thing down without being confused.

The point is my apparel for the paper I'm giving. I've thought about this. It needs to be formal. I could probably get away with just a button-up shirt and a decent tie, but I learned from the costume that I can't count on my tie skills to reach a level of "decent" by Saturday. So that means I need to wear a suit jacket. The problem is, I have only one suit jacket, and I wore that as part of the costume on Saturday. Consequently, it's covered it's a little messy--mostly with little specks of grey hair spray. (See, Barry Zuckerkorn has grey hair, and I don't... etc.) This morning, I took the suit to the nearest cleaner that would promise on the phone to have it cleaned by Wednesday. (If it fails to deliver, then... well, back to the tie.)

Then, finally, we reached the most difficult part of today: transporting a suit on a hanger while riding a bicycle. I had a suit sleeve at least (is that the right word?), but there was no decent way to handle it. If I threw it over a shoulder, it would get caught in the back tire. I tried to bike using one hand, and holding the suit upright in the other, but one good hill made me realize how much I needed both hands to operate both brakes. (Plus, in the panic that followed, I rested the hook of the hanger on my hand while I grasped the brake. So while both my hands were occupied, it was digging into my skin. Ow.) Finally, I sort of just laid it between my legs in such a way that it didn't drag on the ground. Admittedly, it's not going to help the suit's wrinkles, but... well, that's part of the dry cleaning, right? But clearly, that's not an option on the return trip. I don't know what I'll do.

I guess I'll just have to walk the five blocks.

Later Days.

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